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Recorded live at the Bowery Poetry Club
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40 Nerd Letters
Dear Boba,
I still think of you
Dear Heroes,
When your second season sucked, I walked away
haven't looked back
Dear Hermione,
You're just too young
Dear Shatner,
I said horrible things about you
Your hair is fine
It's your acting I can't stand
Dear Zelda,
Thank you for the fun times
For every thumb blister
Dear Willow,
I love you, simple
But only seasons 1-3
Dear Jar Jar,
The nightmares stopped eventually
Dear Dude,
There will never be enough white russians
for me to just abide
Dear Rob Liefield,
I did read your comics
all of them
Dear Donkey Kong,
I will never stop looking up for barrels
ready to run
Dear Daredevil,
I'll always love you
You are all there ever was
Dear Michael Bay,
It was no one movie
your everything is impossible
Dear Xander,
We are mirrored nerds
we will battle this to the end
Dear Boba,
I still think of you
Dear Lexx,
I love you, simple
discovering you on late night sci-fi channel was a delicious accident
Dear Green Lantern,
Your power ring came too late
I was already in the other room with Daredevil
Dear Smallville,
No
Dear Attack of the Clones,
I thought you'd be too shitty
They said go anyway
they are fools
Dear Eliza Dushku,
You are the definition of unrequited
Dear Nerd Girl,
I'm sorry about the whiskey
and the tampon
I'm sorry I can't stop calling you
Dear Monty Python,
As soon as you made me smile
I was yours
Dear Preacher,
I liked the book too much
Is the movie still happening?
Dear Batman and Robin,
You were my biggest mistake
I'm sure that makes the DVD sales all the more sinister
Dear 6 of 9,
As you spouted Borg rhetoric
I imagined you and me in Pan Far
Dear Karen,
I'd of swallowed that billy club
just like I did the betrayal in "Born Again"
I still think of you as Miller's
Dear Peter,
They say a man never forgets his first redhead
how easily time flies
Dear Boba,
I still think of you
Dear Veronica Mars,
I'd of broken you in half
Dear Cris,
I'm sorry I stalked you
I'd try to forget me too
Dear Transformers,
I can't be with you again
just accept it
Dear Dr. Who,
No
I can't watch you die
again
Dear Joss,
I wrote a poem about you
No one really read it
I think its stupid
Dear Life-size Darth Vader Statue,
I finally stopped wanting you
Dear Last Dragon,
I was drunk
um... actually that's it
Dear Des,
Maybe it was the Superman t-shirt
or the fact you were awkward too
You were the first time I learned
nerd fantasy girls can come to life
Maybe you're still a nerd
Call me
Dear nerd girl at Nationals,
I was your biggest mistake
Dear Terry Moore,
You are more than Strangers in Paradise
more than I could ever put in a poem
Dear Boba,
I still think of you
Dear Boba,
I keep pictures of your first action figure in a box
each one, in its original package
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